Lately I have been thinking that the group of my friend is not the same as the group of people I like.
Now, I like all of my friends, but not everyone I like I can (still) consider a friend.
Friendship for me is defined, in addition to mutual affection, by regular contact (even if I have been bad at that lately, very much so. I will try and return your emails tonight or so!) and taking part in each others life.
But there are some people I like who once were friends, where I do not have the feeling anymore that I know what is going on in their lives or that they really care anymore what is going on here. And that makes me sad. I probably could just initiate contact myself, but this is a two-way responsibilty and I have done all I can, for sure.
Why is stopping to care about people so fucking hard? Or rather why is it so upseting to like someone when I am not liked back, or maybe I am liked back but at least I am not considered a friend.
And I know I am running the risk of the people who aren't meant by this entry will think I am writing about them, when most likely I am not. In fact if you are reading this, I am not.
7:29 p.m. - 2003-11-17
Recent entries:
peeking in - 2006-01-23
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